As reported by Fox News, Mr. Swanson, 25, was just trying to make some sweet, sweet love with 34-year-old Melanie Arnold.

And Ms. Arnold was enjoying that sweet, sweet love.

Loudly.

Ms. Arnold’s 16-year-old daughter mistook her mother’s cries of passion and an apparent erotic slap as the sounds of an assault, so she took matters into her own hands.

She and four of her teenage friends went to her mother’s bedroom, knocked on the door, and, when her mother opened the door, set upon Mr. Swanson.

Mr. Swanson tried to get away, but the teens chased him down and started beating him – one even began hitting him with a bat.

Four of the teens have been charged with assault.

Ms. Arnold is quoted as saying, “Instead of asking what was going on, they assumed and took matters into their own hands.”  She went on, “Now they have to learn a lesson.”

I think Mr. Swanson probably learned a lesson, too:  If you are really going to get your freak on, keep the door closed and locked.